


I Won't Mind

by superkara



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Not fluffy AT ALL, SuperCorp, don't hate me too much, i decided to share anyway, i felt like i had to do it, i wrote it mainly for myself, karlena
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-13
Updated: 2017-01-13
Packaged: 2018-09-17 07:54:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9312410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/superkara/pseuds/superkara
Summary: Happiness never lasts and Lena should have known it.Kara's and Lena's relationship through the song "i won't mind".





	

_Don't look around cause love is blind_

_And darling right now I can't see you_

  
  


  
  


She arrived in my office accompanied by none less than Clark Kent, he was all sharp jawline, narrowed eyes, tight lips, like the cold and unexpected wind that hits you on a winter morning (quite not pleasant).  
  
She was everything but that, soft yet strong features, bright blue eyes in which curiosity could be seen sparkling, but also a hint of something Lena could not put a name to. Shining blonde hair, oh so soft lips and an aura that reminded her of the long gone days spent in Killiney, watching the sunset and feeling so at  _ease._

 _"_ And Supergirl was there too!"

  
  


"And who are you exactly?"

  
  


"I'm  _Kara Danvers."_

  
  


If someone had told Lena Luthor that the name just pronounced from those pink lips was gonna be her strenght and biggest weakness, she wouldn't have believed it, not in a million years.

  
  


_I'm feeling proud so without a doubt_

_I can feel you_

  
  


"I hope this isn't the last time we talk"

  
  


"I hope not either"

  
  


She was once again standing in front of me, skirt, pink blazer and those now familiar glasses. I found myself wondering how would she look without them, but also without something else.  
I would never admit it to myself, not even today, how much I hoped for those words to be true. I wanted to talk to her, to hear her voice filling that cold and lonely office, fill my ears, my life.  
  
So she did, the next day I found her outside my office door, having a heated argument with my assistant, Jess. Kara was all pink cheeks, funny voice and even funnier hand gestures. "Excuse me but Miss Luthor doesn't allow visits unless you already booked one-" Jess tried to explain before a very much angry and huffing Kara interrupted her "No,  _you excuse me_...Jess. It's past 8pm and I'm quite sure Miss Luthor haven't eaten the whole day much less had dinner so if you would be so  _nice_ and let me In-"

  
  


"Kara?" 

  
  


She turned around and looked at me, surprise written on her face and maybe embarrassment for being caught like that. "Jess, it's okay. Kara Danvers is supposed to be shown in right away whenever possible from now on, thank you." The blonde was now staring at the ground, a small smile tugging at her lips. I can't deny how pleasant it was seeing her so shy and flustered.

  
  
  


We entered my office and I looked at her, suddenly so confident, sitting on my couch and taking our dinner out of the boxes. We ate in silence, enjoying each other's company, until she broke it. "Umm...I was thinking about the thing you said the other day, wanting to make a name for yourself outside your family and...I'm so glad that you can  _understand_ me.  
  
I would be lying if i said that her words didn't make me wonder if there was more to this woman. I kept looking at her, so bright, so good, she reminded me of the moon, always showing the same face, the same bright one but constantly hiding the other, much darker. And I, as the fool and space lover that I am, was gonna find it out the hard way.

  
  


_ Cause we are who we are when no one's watching _

  
  


“Those flowers are beautiful”

  
  


“They're called Plumerias, they're really rare”

  
  


She looked at them with so much curiosity and it reminded me of why, even today, I bring a bouquet of plumerias each day to my office, almost hoping that she will show up and tell me how beautiful they are but not as beautiful as me.  
  
I told her about Lex, how he has been the only one who could understand me, who accepted me, and once again she looked at me as if everything I said finally made sense. She would smile, caress my hand, and tell me that it was okay, it was okay to cry, to feel, to be  _human._

  
  


  
  


_ And right from the start, you know I got you _

  
  


The helicopter I was on suddenly took the wrong direction, I tried to focus on the outside and noticed this little robot (or that's what it seemed like) shooting bullet after bullet. I turned on my right, trying to make the pilot react but the poor man passed out in front of my eyes, and that's when real fear started creeping down my back.  
  
A loud noise coming from behind the helicopter, the little robot was gone, and I could now feel the vehicle slowly but carefully beeing dragged down, until it touched the ground. The door on the right side got ripped off and that's when I saw her, in all her glory, the shiny S on her chest, the symbol that every single person in National City correlated with safety, with peace and heroism, the same symbol that would represent my sweetest downfall.

_  
“It's okay, you're safe now.” _

  
  


* * *

 

  
  


“Who would've believed it? A Luthor and a Super working together. I hope we can work together more in the future.”  
  
“Me too.”

  
  


And then she smiled so wide and big, no one else in that city has ever smiled so openly to me, no one else but Kara. I wish I hadn't been so blind, I wish I had realized it much earlier, that I was in fact looking at the darkest side of the moon, the one that I was so desperately searching for. I was looking at her and I could feel myself slowly fading and falling in the void, a void that seemed having no end.

  
  


_ We messed around until we found the one thing we said we could _

_ never ever live without _

  
  


How is it possible to love two people at the same time, you may ask? If I could I'd gladly rip my heart out and show you how both parts of it were beating for a different person, but somehow at the same pace, as if it knew they were both one and the same.  
  
The brightest side of the moon was like the sun, kissing my body in the morning with its light. She was like the fresh air that filled my lungs at each breath, the reason I would smile, the reason I started loving myself for who I was. I loved her with the purest side of myself, I loved her slowly, tenderly, I loved her the way she deserved to be loved, completely and with no limits.  
  
The darkest side of the moon was my biggest sin, my bane. Dirty thoughts running through my mind, sleepless nights, chest ripping fire burning in my lungs. She was my ruin, my delirium, like a drug one could never get enough of. I loved her roughly, I loved her hard, intensly, with every inch of my body, and with what was left of my consumed soul.  
  
I was falling then, and there was no going back from that bottomless void, only the dark and the light, turning into one.

  
  


_ I'm not allowed to talk about it _

_ but I gotta tell you _

  
  


  
  


Kara and I were walking hand in hand, talking about our days and looking forward to our little date, to celebrate the first year together. I was opening the door of the restaurant when shots were fired. Chaos broke all around me, people screaming, getting their lives taken away, and then shots were fired in my direction.  
  
Five bullets, _five bullets_ hit Kara who put herself in front of me. A scream ripped my chest when I expected to see her lifeless body fall on the ground, blood stained clothes, but it never happened. Her dress was torn in a half, to reveal the truth underneath, a truth that wore the shining red cape, in all its glory and purity.  
  
  
I cried myself to sleep that night. Twenty missed calls and infinite unread texts, but I could not move. It wasn't hurt, it was the realization of the love I had for her, I could now see the moon, each side of it at the same time. No human has ever had that possibility, no one has ever been able to see her in its full nature, and survive.  
  
It didn't last long until I gave in and hit rock bottom.  
  
We made love for what felt like days, she worshiped every inch of my body, every corner. She showed me what it looked like to touch the stars with my hands, in all our nakedness, in all our blind love. Because nothing mattered in the world, nothing but her, the brightest sun of them all, my perdition, my life.  
  
  
  


  
  


_ I won't mind _

_ even though I know you'll never be mine _

  
  


  
  


I never thought my new beginning would turn into my biggest regret.  
  
It was my mother, the mother I never loved nor respected, but whose love I still searched to this day. She created the most deathly virus on earth, oh how I wish it were for us ungrateful humans, instead of the lost souls seeking shelter in this poor excuse of a world that we call earth. I wish it had been for me, I wish it had taken me too, because life never seemed more unworth living.  
  
A simple rocket launched in the sky, and my love was after it in a matter of seconds, flying as fast as she could, grabbing it and then...  _silence._  
  
The explosion was so loud that I could feel my ears giving up, the sky turned blood red and that's when I looked up and saw a single body, the body of an angel falling down. No human should ever witness the fall of a goddess, the beauty and grace craved into her features. No man should ever get to see a star falling, a star whose light was now weaker than ever, no man should ever see a star dying.

Her body hit the ground and I was on my feet again, using the last bit of strenght in my body, I ran to her.  
She was all cuts and bruises, I dared not to touch a single bit of her body in fear of breaking her, oh the irony. I waited, I waited for what felt like hours, for something, for anything, and then with the last bit of air in her lungs she spoke.  
  
_“Be your own hero, my ghra'”_  
  
And she smiled, despite the tears, despite knowing that was gonna be the last moment for us, she smiled and the earth stopped forever. Because without its sun and moon it is nothing, it doesn't exist, it doesn't function. And I stopped with it.  
  
Hot tears streaming down my face, a last lingering kiss that tasted like smoke, but that to me was like the first, like the first time our mouths touched and I just knew she was the one, the only one.  
Blue eyes closing, the sky behind them was now gone and with it the smile on her face faded, leaving in my hands the stoic perfection of an angel, who never stopped shining, not even in its death.

  
  


And then  _darkness._

  
  


I never allowed myself to love again, not when her last words were inked so close to my heart, the same heart who was beating still for her, both of its sides now only one, united in their mourning.  
  
Because she was my beginning, the one I never expected to have, the one I lived and never will regret until my last breath. Because she taught me what real love looks likes and it is enough for me, it will always be.  
  
And she was my end, she showed me the courage, she showed me the stars, and how can a simple man even accept anything less once he saw what paradise looked like? How can a man settle for the void when he saw what real happiness is?  
  
She was my love at first sight, at last sight and eternal sight. She was Kara Zor El, and she shall not be forgotten.

  
  


_I won't mind_

_even though I know you'll never be mine_   
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I hope you don't hate me too much after this, I felt like I had to write it because this song means a lot to me and I'm a little (a lot) dramatic. If any of you were wondering, "Ghra'" means "love" in Irish, I just thought Kara would have learned it a little bit to impress the girl. Here as always my tumblr link [x](http://karagaynvers.tumblr.com/) so you can yell at me (as i deserve it). Until next time xoxo


End file.
